....no, I did not stir herbs and garlic into butter and call it homemade. 
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I made butter. In my food processor.
And really, is there ever a time in your life that you need homemade butter more than a cloudy Wednesday in the middle of tax season? 
In unrelated news, I couldn't sleep this morning so I got up at 5:45 and worked on our taxes until I had to leave to go teach yoga at 7:45.
Two hours of tax prep! YES, I deserve the butter.
So homemade butter! You know that I'm obsessed with Rachael Ray. I want to be her best friend. The other day it was SO SUNNY AND GORGEOUS outside and I wanted to photograph something new for you but didn't know what and THEN on her show Jaques Pepin of all people made butter in a food processor with one ingredient!
So I made butter in a food processor with one ingredient and then added 3 more ingredients and then ate a lot of it with little bread. For the butter, you really only need heavy cream. And 5 minutes, REALLY. 
Add the cream to a food processor, and turn it on! You may need to use a small insert for the cream - once it starts to whip if it sticks to the sides too much it won't turn to butter - you need the blade to be involved with the cream the whole time. 
After 2 minutes or so, you can look for fun - whipped cream!
And after 4-5 minutes, the cream will break and separate from the liquids. Leaving you with BUTTER. 
While the cream is whipping, grab any flavorings you'd like - salt, garlic, and parsley were my drugs of choice. 
Put them all on a cutting board together, then mince mince mince until you have a salty garlicky herby paste. 
Now, grab the clumpy butter mixture and pour it through a fine strainer. Feed the liquid to your dogs! Or do something else fun with it! Let the butter strain for a bit, and pat it dry with paper towels if you'd like. 
Now, to flavor the butter! Add 1 tablespoon of the herb mixture to your butter, and gently stir it in with a spoon. Taste the butter, and add more salt if you'd like. The garlic flavor will intensify as the butter sits, so don't stress if it's not super garlicky right this very second. 
While you're stirring in the herbs, there might be some extra liquid that gets pressed out of the butter - just pour it away to keep the butter really creamy. 
This, my friends, is homemade, 10 minute or less butter. It is kind of warm from the blade when you first make it, and keeps in the fridge as long as....butter....does. It's a great condiment to make, and you could flavor it anyway you like!
What fun, right? RIGHT?
I promise this is delicious, simple, and the flavor is incredible - like a really fancy smooth butter since there are no preservatives or chemicals. 
Make this soon! You can also do it by hand if you don't have a food processor and want your forearms to look like Popeye's. 
Which I kind of do so....
Recipe
Homemade Garlic Herb Butter
Ingredients
- 1 cup heavy cream
- ½ teaspoon salt
- 1 clove garlic
- 2 tablespoons fresh parsley
- bread if desired, for serving
Instructions
- Add the heavy cream to a small food processor or blender. Turn on, and process for 4-5 minutes until the cream separates.
- Meanwhile, finely chop the salt, garlic, and parsley together to form a paste.
- When the butter has separated from the cream, pour through a fine mesh strainer and pat with paper towels. Place the butter in a bowl with the herb mixture and stir to combine. Taste, and add more salt if you'd like.
- Serve or use as desired.
Shared with Weekend Potluck.
I really really love reading your blog. I'm terrible at cooking - but when I read this its like you sit me down, as a friend, and tell me to suck it up and just do it. Thanks for being awesome.
Well you are a friend, and one of my greatest so... 🙂