It's Monday. It's also Monday before a holiday and doesn't that just...mean things? We're excited it's a short week, we're still tired from the weekend, we're nervous that the short work week means that next Monday will totally blow, and then there's.....the holiday. A great holiday, full of family and food and fun.
For most people, right? I've heard multiple people at our yoga studio recently say how much they need MORE CLASSES THANKSGIVING WEEKEND because omg family.
It's not a bad thing, being aware that family can be stressful. In fact, it might be worse to have zero ability to know what situations and events WILL be stressful to you. We all have those, right? If really nothing stresses you out ever then go away. I'm jealous and don't want to talk to you.
I am good approximately 7% of the time at finding calm within rather than allowing the entire effed up world and the effed up humans in it negatively affect me.
THAT'S NOT A LOT OF THE TIME. So I practice more. I actively tell myself that I really can't control others' crazy and that they're just messed up and not trying to wreck my entire life. Then I remind myself that I'M CRAZY TOO and to let it go, full stop.
I have a theory. The people at my yoga studio? The people who do things alone that involves introspection and quiet? They're not assholes for admitting that the holidays make them crazy. They just practice more, and when they identify something that helps them find inner quiet they DO IT MORE.
It's all practice - not mastery. We don't DO yoga, we practice it. There is a very specific reason we call it a practice - we have quiet constant repetition of simple things, and eventually we advance. Mentally, physically, whatever. With effort and repetition comes progress, no matter how slow.
My sister and mom and I talked about being loud outspoken introverts, and how that can be a tough place to find yourself in. I WANT TO SAY YES TO EVERYTHING, but when I do I get pissy and tired and overwhelmed and guilty all at the same time? So I practice saying no when I'm reaching the "omg give me alone time" point before I start being a shithead to people I love.
Sometimes practice doesn't feel productive. Other times you NAIL something you've been practicing (anyone have a kid learning how to play an instrument? practice ain't always pretty) and OMG IT WORKED LET'S DO MORE OF THAT.
So. If you know that there are things in your life that make you embrace quiet and still, do more of them. Practice more. If you find yourself flying off the handle and being miserable because you forgot not to let the outside world affect you so much, FINE. It happens. All the time. To good people. Give yourself a gee dee break and practice some more.
Also? Holidays should be fun. Be honest with yourselves, sweet friends. If you're taking on too much, let someone else help you. If you REALLY can't be around some people, you likely don't have to (unless you're in jail and you don't like the warden? seriously exercise the right to say no). You're allowed to create a holiday experience for yourself and your family that doesn't make you miserable OR guilty - did you know that?
Think on it. And choose to be happy and mostly quiet on the inside this week. Or at least practice. Then you'll be ready for Christmas!